Monday, September 30, 2013

HERE'S WHAT

As I mentioned last week, things have been a little stressful lately, but I always try to find the good in everything. Here are some things that have put a little pep in my step lately. I'm linking up with The good life blog today...even though I'm a minute or two late on that...




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1. Daring Greatly by Brene Brown. Whether or not you are in the mental health / social work fields, this book is something you should be reading. She's a social worker who spent 10 years of her life doing research on vulnerability, and ended up with thousands of stories and interviews that she analyzed and put into this book. She wrote this book to encourage parents and teachers, and...just people, to be vulnerable, to deepen their connections with one another. She is hilarious, and brilliant, and heartfelt, and just amazing. Do yourself a favor, go to Tarjay and pick yourself up a copy. 

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2. This view, and well, Starbucks. You can't really tell in this photo but this is the back porch of the Starbucks on base where my husband works. It looks out over a Bayou. Its basically gorgeous. Its my new "place" . And Starbucks, well that's self explanatory for why it puts a pep in my step ;). 

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3. This guy in baby shades. I mean. 

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4. My thesis in book form! Signed, Sealed, and Delivered. I'm official. And boy, I'm so so glad THAT is done. I actually know what it is like to have a book deadline, and...whew. 

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5. This. is. so. good. We moved from a place with a Trader Joe's to a place without a Trader Joe's. Can we have a moment of silence for that? Thanks, I feel better. So Now that means I have to spend more than $5 on an excellent bottle of wine. This, at $11 hardly breaks the bank. Its a lightly sparkling white wine. It is sweet, but not as sweet as a Moscato, and very refreshing on a hot FL. evening. When you head to Tarjay to get Daring Greatly, swing by the wine aisle and pick up a bottle. Yumsies. 

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6. I was in line minding my own business at my local Starbucks - which is in a Target by the way, (wow lots of Starbucks and Target in one post) and the lady in front of me orders a bottle of syrup. I know at one point that Starbucks sold a bunch of "do it at home" kind of stuff including some of their syrup but I thought that was a one time deal. I'd also heard of people paying insane amounts of money for PSL syrup purchased black-market style on ebay and such. But for $10 she got 1 litre of the good stuff. Obviously I'm a quick study and got my iced two pump americano with a side of one litre vanilla sugar free syrup and charge it please. 

What are some things that have made you happy lately? 

Thursday, September 26, 2013

Things I don't want to talk about

Prepare for an extremely long winded post that is perhaps hard to follow at times, but bear with me. (Also, none of these photos really relate to the post- but I figured it would help with the monotony ;) ) 

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Today marks two days shy of a month from our big move. We have only been in the new house for a little shy of 3 weeks. Basically everything that has happened in our life in the past month has been good. But it has been really, really, really hard. I don't say this to be ungrateful- but to be real.  As an INTJ I am famously private, insular, solitary...to a fault, and I'm trying to be more open. I have been helped by the friends I've made through blogging or by things I have read on other's blogs; so I say all of this with hopes that maybe sometime someone will read this and maybe I helped them in some small way. 

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The house we moved into was less than ready to be moved into. Its beautiful for the most part, its in a nice neighborhood, and all that. It had no hot water, holes in the walls, and filthy carpets to name a few. The landlords have been a nightmare to deal with, and we have additional unplanned monthly bills for this house. 

Money this month has been rough. Don't worry I was raised right, I'm not going into specifics here. We've saved for a year for this move. But almost as a rule, the Navy messes your paycheck up during a move or promotion, and well, both of those things have happened (again- both good!) but it may not get fixed next month, and the major amounts of money we spent on the move won't be repaid for maybe 12 weeks or longer due to the sequester (lack of manpower to do the needed paperwork).

A LOT of our belongings were messed up in the move. We put in a $15,000.00 claim for damaged goods (to give you an idea). That won't be accepted. (not being negative nancy- we try to keep a PMA - or positive mental attitude for those non-breaking bad watchers). But the movers just won't pay that much. My dresser, which was made by hand by my great, great, great grandfather was split up the side during the move. No amount of money will fix that or replace it. 

Since Henry was born I've struggled with major hormonal imbalances that still have not straightened out, coupled with post partum depression and anxiety. None of this was made easier by that. 

I promise I don't say any of this to be dramatic or negative. I am humbled every day at the unending blessings I have in my life. I am saying this because this has been what I consider to be a "white knuckle" moment in my life. 

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Casey is a fellow blogger, and someone who I have never met in person, but someone who I consider to be a friend. She talks a lot about entitlement in her blog. And she's talked to me several times about entitlement. I am not entitled to ANY thing that has gone on in the past month to have gone ANY better than it did. None of us are entitled to anything. We are not even entitled to another breath, or another day. We are entitled to what has already passed.


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My faith has been a big part of keeping me from "losing it" over the past few weeks. God doesn't promise an easy path, but he promises he'll be there. It has taken me a long long time to "get that", and I still struggle with trusting that it will all be okay.  I've had to remind myself to trust during my moments of entitlement, of expectation, that things SHOULD be different because I prayed about it darnit! Because I visualized it going well! Because I expected it to! Because I'm a good person, I deserve it! My husband who serves our country deserves this. My son deserves this. Well... Murphy's law and all that. 





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I have been working on being more positive, as I've said before. This has been a perfect test of that. And I've failed many days, and many times each day. But this experience so far has taught me that you really truly can learn from every single thing that happens in your life. Sometimes it comes easier than other times. Some times it takes a note to self every hour, every minute, every second. Its not easy to just say "be positive", but I've learned that being positive (and that just means doing your best, not being perfect with sunshine shooting out of your ears all the time) through everything really is worth it.


via Pinterest unsure of original source

 
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